Humans Need Food

I feel bad posting more than once a day. I feel that since I don't get to update regularly due to living in a truck with 9sqft of space and jumping from truck stop to stop, I should space them out. I recently decided (seriously, I just decided this as I was typing that last sentence) since I don't get to update often...to hell with regulating my literary genius, I will post five entries a day if I so desire!

This one is about food. It's not going to have pictures that look as good as the meals they are depicting taste. It will not have recipes. Why? See above. I live in a truck. It has a bed, cupboards, two chairs, and disturbingly massive shifter. No kitchen.Cooking for me means making a sandwhich for Dan out of pitifully small pieces of wheat bread, bologna, nasty American cheese (oh, how I hate American cheese...) and condiments out of those little packets that I stole from Wendy's when I thought no one was looking.



Living in the truck has encouraged me to, once we move out of here, completely swear off fast food and almost completely swear off restaurants entirely. But only almost, I imagine after getting back to cooking for awhile it won't be as exciting to me as it is right now. Still, I dream of the days when I can cook and bake, take pictures of my tasty creations, put it all together into a blog entry, and then: eat it. Since I can't do this right now, I live vicariously through food blogs. I spend hours poring over these pieces of interweb heaven and have been adding to and perfecting my recipe collection for...well...pretty much since I moved in.

For quite awhile I was under the impression that making posts about food would be pointless for me. There's already god-knows-how-many food blogs out there, and the people who write them appear to be really great cooks. I mean, spring loaded cake pan? Cream cheese dough? What? All of this left me feeling pretty, um, inadequate. But then I started noticing some things.

Example 1: there are people out there who don't know how to make pie crust. Oh, the blasphemy. Furthermore...there are people out there who don't know how to make pie crust....so instead they buy pre-made pie crusts. From the freezer section at the store. I may have almost expelled the contents of my stomach.

Example 2: there are people out there who have only ever made cake from a box and soup from a can. Don't these people have mothers? Is this percentage of the population made up entirely of orphans?

Needless to say, reading this really awesome food blogs that have to include information on the aforementioned made me feel pretty good about myself, even if I've never made a soufle or attempted something as scary as a bagel. My mother in law, however, does not. I love her to death, but, she makes me feel like an idiot in the kitchen.

Me: Where do you keep your spatulas?
Mother in law: -proceeds to enter kitchen and cook the entire meal for me-

You get the idea.

All this comes down to is that despite the fact I'm not a professional pastry chef or amazing cook, when I have that kitchen of my own...I will enlighten you, because I guess there are some people, pity their souls, who might actually learn from what I have to share.

Now that wonderful husband of mine, oh man, I want to make him into a life sized Weasel suit so I can wear him all day because he's so comfy and warm. Really. He's the comfiest person on the planet. Just ask anyone who has hugged him. He doesn't even have to put effort into the hug, and it's still like rolling around in gently toasted duck feathers. This is one of the primary reasons I allowed him the privilege of marrying me. Anyways, this comfy guy is going to bed, so it's cuddle time for me. I'll continue this later...with the topic of the human-food relationship.